The prospect of a return to Tescograd made it difficult for the Witch to enter the festive spirit last month, but her new E-Pantomime is now in preparation so here’s a preview.
Dumb and Dumber is a firm of estate agents headquartered in London SW1, with branch offices in the Cotswolds (Chipping Norton) and the North of England (Sheffield). Its managing partner is David Dumb, whose main business involves selling upmarket real estate (and anything else of a speculative nature) to uber-wealthy foreigners. His deputy Nick Dumber, meanwhile, focusses mainly on suburban properties in Middle England and more affordable housing in older industrial conurbations. However, there are increasing tensions within the partnership, as the foreign oligarch market seems to have peaked (along with the price of oil), and Nick Dumber has started to challenge the viability of the Dumb-led business model. For his part, David Dumb would like to oust Dumber from the partnership altogether, and is currently in clandestine discussion with a rival firm of agents called Farage & Co, with a view to the creation of a strategic alliance during May 2015. Farage & Co used to specialise in properties in struggling English seaside towns, but has more recently embarked on branch development throughout the provinces beyond London.
Providing a romantic sub-plot to the main action and comic shenanigans of Dumb and Dumber is a three-way love story involving City banker George Chancellor, his Bichon Frise lap dog and Freya the Cat. The dog has recently caused the exclusion of Freya from George’s affections. Banished to a life in Kent, she has become a green activist, with a particular concern for homeless humans and their companion animals. Freya is currently wondering whether she should sell some of George’s darker secrets to the Tabloid press to fund her philanthropic activities, and is about to contact former prisoner and media hack Andy Coulson with the material.
As well as providing traditional family pantomime, “Dumb and Dumber” also comes with an “Adults Only” E-Cabaret. Blair Wizard Entertainments have brought together stars old and new in a spectacular show called “Boom and Bust”. Headline performers include Merv “The King of Swing”, Lehman Brothers and The Crash. Musical numbers from “The Roaring Noughties” will include Spend, Spend, Spend and Shop ‘Til You Drop, and there will be more recent hits like Austerity Blues. All proceeds will go to the Blair Wizard Charitable Trust and a special project to rehabilitate politicians and their spin doctors after a spell in the clink (gaol).
The Witch of Worcester 